Recipe for a rough time...

so yesterday, the mrs. calls the young man to let me know the oldest mini-me (who has been acting a complete and total ass for the last few weeks) went on a tirade at his expensive-ass school, and (1) knocked over the blocks two little girls were stacking up and then decided to throw the blocks at the aforementioned little girls, and (2) started flipping over chairs and tables once his teacher left for the day. the mrs. sounded frustrated, and said " i don't know what else to do..." me, being the young MAN, responded with "I know what to do! I'ma beat his ass, he gets no TV tonight, and he will not be going to any of the birthday parties he's been invited to!" done and done, right?

"WRONG!!" (c) Charlie Murphy

see, mini me is 4.5 years old, and i have never had to actually whip him, like, with a belt before. so from the time i hung up with the mrs. to the point i was explaining to him why i had to do this, i was praying for an out. i know this will no doubt get easier to do with time, but that first time

SUCKS

COMPLETE

ASS.

the fear in those big brown eyes ripped me to shreds. that and hearing him sob "i don't want you to whip me, daddy!" i fought back tears the entire time, thinking about how i felt back in the day when i was on the other end of the belt, because even then it wasn't the pain, but the feeling of humiliation that it was happening, and the fear that my mom was doing this because she hated me. even as i type this, i am misting up.

this mini-me was born with a heart condition (but he is so defying the odds :-] ), and i think the despair i felt last night ran a close second to what i felt during all of his surgeries. then there was the internal dialogue (you are the worse father ever, you should have just given him a break, you know how his heart is, blahblahblah...) needless to say, the tears didn't stay in for too long. the mrs. was there for me and helped me get thru it all.

so now to explain the title. the recipe for a rough time: add one first-time disciplinary action for your baby, and mix in the death of one of your favorite celebrities (see previous post). Yield: a severe funk with a hot soundtrack.


-tym